Knowing Deny Not everything has to be granted

Knowing Deny Not everything has to be granted

Knowing how to deny is another Baltasar Gracián aphorism that seems to have been written for us real estate sellers, that as it will be seen, although it is of general application, is an especially useful advice for us. See here the original aphorism:

Knowing Deny Not everything has to be granted

Knowing how to deny, by Baltasar Gracian

Aphorism 70: Knowing how to deny

Not everything has to be granted, nor to everyone. It matters as much as knowing how to grant, and in those who command it is urgent attention. Here enters the mode: more is estimated not of some than the yes of others, because a non-golden satisfies more than a yes to dry. There are many who always have the word "no", with which everything is unpleasant. He is not always the first in them, and although after all they come to grant it, they are not esteemed, because he preceded that first uneasiness. They do not have to deny of rondón the things: it goes to drinks the disappointment; nor is it to be denied at all, that it would be to discourage dependence. There are always some relics of hope left to temper the bitterness of denying. Fill courtesy with the emptiness of favor and supplant the good words the lack of works. The No and the Yes are brief to say and ask a lot to think. (1)

Comments to Know Deny

It is important to know how to deny what is asked of us and how to grant it. Gracián begins by noticing the value that sometimes has the ability to say NO and points out, that the one who can do what is asked of him, neither has to do it always nor has he to grant it to all, nor it must do it in any way.

It resembles the importance of knowing how to grant - to say yes - with the right to reject the request, - to say no. And he warns, that for those who rule (2), it is urgent to know this fact and abandon the tendency to always say NO in a devastating, improper or systematic way.

But he gives us the rule and warns, as good preceptor, its consequences and remedies. And for this reason, he advises that when a request has to be denied, it is necessary to " brown" (decorate, aromatize, sweeten ...) the negative, otherwise it would be " to degrade the dependence" , that is, radically worsen the situation between the plaintiff and who denies the desired. (3) We should not remind the real estate salesman that "browning" what is said to the potential client is a powerful resource, which we should not forget.

And it warns us of something ultramodern, the seller -and anyone- should avoid expressive disorder and take into account what is said first. Know that the latter influences later perception and be prudent in the use of language. « He is not always the first in them, and even though everything is granted afterwards, they are not esteemed, because he preceded that first uneasiness

He also warns us of the advantages of presenting the NO - when it is possible - « to drinks " and not in a single pull, leaving even -without betraying the No- a possible loophole to which perhaps, in other circumstances, the negative answer current may change in the future.« The No and the Yes are brief to say and ask for a lot of thinking


Stay healthy!

Miguel Villarroya Martín, June 19, 2016/Madrid, Spain/FrS.015/


(1) The text original of the aphorism presented, the 70: Saber deny , has been extracted from the First Edition of Manual Oracle and Art of Prudence, by Baltasar Gracian , published in Huesca, Aragón, in 1647 . And it is presented with its original spelling. Book scanned by Google BOOKS.

(2) Recall that the Oracle is a manual for "rulers"; today we would say executives of companies or entrepreneurs.

(3) In the annotated edition of Emilio Blanco, for Chair. Hispanic letters , that author brings a very interesting note: "It's wrong who denies everything and badly who gives everything.", By Joaquín Setanti . See 340, on p. 141 of the text mentioned.

(4) The image used is a fragment of the one found in Wikipedia , which, as we read in it, is a Anonymous author's picture, found in Graus. (Graus is a Spanish town and municipality of the Ribagorza , in the province of Huesca ), where it appears as an image of D.P. From this image a fragment has been taken, and passed through the pencil effect of Photofunia. We thank everyone for the use of this image,

(4) This aphorism, with its comments, was published a few years ago (May 2008), more briefly, in number 21 of my magazine More and Better Real Estate Sales.

Source of the cover image.

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